A Plea to the Cyber World

I get irritated sometimes by acronyms, and one in particular really butters my poptart … hmm, ok, so that’s not an expression. But you know what I mean.

Anyway, what is the deal with “lol”? I mean, how often are people really laughing out loud when they type that? Here’s my guess: RARELY! I’d say it’s far more likely their eyes crinkled, they cracked a small smile, or maybe their body shook a bit with humor.

But was there an audible expression of your tickle-ment? Doubtful.

So what I’ve taken to doing, if I really have offered a hearty guffaw to the world around me, is writing: “Lol, literally.”  Now, I’m not one to use that phrase very often. There are far too many sports announcers already out there  overemphasizing their statements with this particular adverb: “Wow! Johnson literally just exploded off the line!” Well, that sounds rather  messy. I hope they have a bit of bleach to get the red stains out of their Astro Turf.

Because so many people have misused the “lol” phrase for far more minor expressions of comedy, I have felt that I must confirm that I truly did push a little air through my diaphragm because of their joke or witticism, and, in the process, I wasted a good .432 seconds of my life writing it out.

So here’s  my plea: STOP USING LOL UNLESS YOU MEAN IT LITERALLY!

Perhaps then I can save those wasted moments and do something more useful with them … like updating my Facebook status.

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