Workout revolution

So recently, in a belated attempt to get my arms slightly buffer in time for summer, I’ve been doing push-ups.

Just think ... You could be almost as ripped as this guy! Pic from Tobyotter on Flickr.

But today, while out on my morning run, I found what may well be a far more effectual method of bicep and tricep toning: you carry stuff while you run.

Now, you don’t have to have any intention of carrying these things, but it definitely helps if you’re simply incapable of passing up a sign that mentions the word “free,” even if the adjective is followed by a less than inviting noun: “crap,” “garbage,” “stuff we’ve had in our attic for the past 19 years.”

So what do I recommend you carry to rid yourself of arm jiggle?

Well, ultimately, it probably doesn’t matter. But you know, normal stuff  will work just fine: running shoes; a lamp; a pair of Rollerblades …

No, no. Don’t worry about setting out on your run with these items. That’s what the generous “free junk” givers are for.

You’ll likely find these arm-toning trinkets–oh, I don’t know–roughly 32 blocks away from your apartment and you’ll probably have to get home in time to shower, put some clothes on and pack a lunch and still manage to get to work on time. So next, you run home.

Trust me. Your arms will burn!

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Battleship

Sitting, waiting, watching ... aw, crap. Pic from flo21 on Flickr.
Sitting, waiting, watching ... aw, crap. Pic from flo21 on Flickr.

I think that, for birds, the process of eating is simply a means of acquiring ammunition for a life that is ultimately, one giant game of battleship.

It hits the grass: miss.

It hits the sidewalk: hit.

It hits the center of the windshield: hit and sink.

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Self-esteem boost

See how cool Mike, William and some other dude look?

I really think that anybody looking to lift their spirits should invest in road biking gear.

I can’t promise that you’ll be a good biker … in fact, you’ll likely be terrible your first few times out.

Yeah, we look pretty cool ...

But the hip-hugging spandex shorts; the sick jersey with special pockets; the shoes that go clip-clop, clip-clop; the sunglasses that make you resemble Neo from The Matrix …

Sleek and slender ... she's gorgeous. Thanks to mikesoltys.com for the pic.

And then there’s the bike: shiny paint, sleek geometry, streamlined construction … awesome.

It doesn’t matter how many rolls are visible through the too-tight apparel or if you actually bought your sunglasses on sale at Walmart … trust me. You’ll look cool.

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Stupid cat

Kind of like this ... only not nearly that cool. Great pic, kirun on flickr.

Good news. It appears that my roommate’s cat actually does serve a purpose.

Despite the fact that it was laying in the exact same position on the couch both when I left this morning at 8:45 and when I returned at 3 p.m., it is now running around the house lunging and diving for a fly that is buzzing at least four feet higher than her maximum jumping capability.

Needless to say that purpose isn’t killing bugs. It’s just my personal amusement.

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